Explorations

Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds? 
Paul Varjak: The mean reds, you mean like the blues? 
Holly Golightly: No. The blues are because you’re getting fat and maybe it’s been raining too long, you’re just sad that’s all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you’re afraid and you don’t know what you’re afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling? 
Paul Varjak: Sure. 
Holly Golightly: Well, when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany’s. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there. If I could find a real-life place that’d make me feel like Tiffany’s, then – then I’d buy some furniture and give the cat a name!

Holly Golightly is probably one of Capote’s most interesting characters. Well, to me anyways. I find Golightly terrifically complex and rich as a character; easy-going, fun loving, chic, extravagant, insecure, unsure….. And then she’s mysterious( platonic company for money..like what?)  I totally dig the girl, and I totally connect with her too.

It’s a pretty undeniable fact of life that we all get the mean reds. These days I find myself getting the mean reds when I start thinking about graduating. And finding a job. And ugh paying bills? But mainly about growing up. Two very big words: Growing Up. It’s a wonderfully scary idea. All these things start to build up and my mind races a mile a minute. Next thing I know I’m afraid and scared and I have no idea how I worked myself up into such a frenzy.

And then beckoning me as a lighthouse to a ship, there it it: The Apple Store.

Oh god, just looking at it now gives me an odd peace with life. I was having one of my “Oh-my-god-the-real-world-is-coming” moments, the feeling of sheer panic and impending doom-when I walked into the Southpoint Apple store last week. To borrow from Ms. Golightly, the whole place calmed me down right away, the quietness and proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there. Everything was clean, and bright, and well lit, sharply polished hardwood flooring and everyone wearing the same colored apple t-shirt. OH! Every polished surface brandishing that unmistakable apple…suddenly all is right in the world. In my world.

So armed with my newfound sense of renewal and self-reassurance, I walk across the pavilion and grab a soup and sandwich at Panera. I’m not big into breakfast foods(…honestly, does anyone really enjoy yogurt) or waking up before at least 9:30am, so its natural that my favorite meal is lunch. And then it hit me: All it takes to rid me of those mean reds is a late lunch at the apple store. If only I could find a ‘real-life’ place that makes me feel like the apple store- growing up might not be so bad…